Why Do We Throw Rice at the Bride and Groom?

 

This custom is not only found all over the world, but it goes back to very ancient times. The marriage ceremony like so many other important events in life, is full of symbolism. (This means that we perform certain acts as symbols of things we wish to express, instead of expressing them directly.)

The use of rice is one of those symbols. It has played a part in marriage ceremonies for centuries. In certain primitive tribes, for instance, the act of eating rice together was the way people got married. This was probably because eating together symbolized living together, and rice happened to be the local food.

Among other peoples, the bride and groom first ate rice together to be married, and then rice was sprinkled over them.

In some cases, rice was used at weddings not to bring the bride and groom together, but to protect them from evil spirits. It was believed that these spirits always appeared at a marriage, and by throwing rice after the married couple, these evil spirits were fed and kept from doing harm to the newly weds.

But for most ancient peoples, rice was a symbol of fruitfulness, and the custom of throwing rice at the bride and groom today goes back to that meaning. It means that we are saying, in symbolic, “May you have many children and an abundance of good things in your future together!”

 

When Were Wedding Rings First Worn?

 

The wearing of a wedding ring is one of the oldest and most universal customs of mankind. The tradition goes back so far that no one can really tell how it first began.

The fact that the ring is a circle may be one reason why it began to be used. The circle is a symbol of completeness. In connection with marriage, it represents the rounding out of the life of a person. We can see how a man without a wife, or a woman without a husband, could have been considered incomplete people. When they are married they make a complete unit, which the circle of the ring symbolizes.

Some people believe the wedding ring really started as a bracelet that was placed on women who were captured in primitive times. Gradually the circular bracelet on the arm or leg, which indicated that she was the property of one man in the tribe, was changed to a ring on the finger.

We know also that primitive man believed in magic. He used to weave a cord and tie it around the waist of the woman he wanted. He believed that with this ceremony her spirit entered his body and she was his forever. The wedding ring may have started this way.

The first people who actually used wedding rings in marriage were the Egyptians. In hieroglyphics, which is Egyptian picture-writing, a circle stands for eternity, and the wedding ring was a symbol of a marriage that would last forever. Christians began to use a ring in marriage around the year 900.

Why is the ring worn on the fourth finger of the left hand? The ancient Greeks believed that a certain vein passed from this finger directly to the heart. But probably the real reason is that we use this finger least of all the fingers, so it’s more convenient to wear an ornament on it!

 

 

When Did the Wedding Cake Originate?

 

The wedding cake goes back to Roman times. In those days, among the highest members of the rich families, a special kind of cake was used in wedding ceremonies. The bride and groom not only ate this cake together, but treated the guests. It is even said that the cake was broken over the bride's head as a symbol of plentifulness! Each of the guests took a piece of cake so they too could have plentifulness in their lives.

Many peoples all over the world have used bridal cakes in their marriage ceremonies. Several of the American Indian tribes had special kinds of cakes made, which the bride would present to the groom.

In Europe, it became the custom for guests to bring to the wedding spiced buns which were piled up in a big heap on a table. The bride and groom were supposed to try to kiss each other over this mound of cake for good luck. The story is told that a French cook, traveling through England, thought it would be a good idea to make one mass out of this mound of little cakes... and that is how our present kind of wedding cake was born!

 

Wedding Superstitions

 

For most people, weddings are a magical time when even the least superstitious will watch for portents of future happiness. As a result, the wedding preparations, ceremony and feast have all become loaded with ritual practices to ward off evil and bless the marriage with fortune and fertility.

The choice of date is important. May is traditionally unlucky for weddings, because in ancient Rome, this was a month for remembering the dead, and an ill-omened time for lovers. In contrast to this, there exists the Christian belief that you shouldn’t marry in Lent. Defying augury, many modern couples marry between Easter and late May, a practice much encouraged by tax rebates. The tradition that the bride’s parents should pay for the wedding dates from two or three centuries ago, when wealthy families would pay an eligible bachelor to take an unmarried daughter off their hands in exchange for a large dowry.

Every bride regards her wedding dress as the most hallowed garment she will ever possess. At most formal weddings, brides still get married in virginal white – many other colours are considered unlucky. Green, for example, is the fairies’ colour and the wearer may fall into the power of the little people. Yellow, purple, orange and red are also to be avoided, though blue is safe. The bride’s veil is of great importance; it once had the double function of protecting the bride from the evil eye, and at the same time served to keep her in seclusion, in case her psychic powers at this time bewitched people. A bride will also ensure that her wedding outfit includes “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue”. “Old” maintains her link with the past; “new” symbolizes the future; “borrowed” gives her a link with the present; and “blue” symbolizes her purity.

Even a modern bride will observe the taboos about wearing her dress before the ceremony. The groom mustn’t see her in it until she enters the church. Nor must she wear the complete outfit before the wedding day. Certainly the veil shouldn’t be tried on at the same time as the dress; many brides put it on for the first time as they leave for the church. Some brides even believe that the sewing of the dress shouldn’t be finished until the day itself, and leave a few stitches to be completed on the wedding morning. It’s a lucky omen if the bride should see a chimney sweep on her way to church. Sometimes a sweep is paid to attend the ceremony and kiss the bride – a relic of the old idea that soot and ashes are symbols of fertility. After the ceremony, the couple are showered with confetti – to bless the marriage with fertility.

One old custom which hasn’t entirely died out was for the bride and sometimes the groom to negotiate some obstacle as they left the church – guests would impede them with ropes of flowers, for example, or with sticks that had to be jumped over. Sometimes a stone was used over which the bride had to jump or be lifted. The belief was that she left all her bad moods behind her, and that the jump symbolizes her leap into a new life. After negotiating these hazards, the bride is faced with the wedding feast. The most important stems is the wedding cake, whose richness symbolizes fertility, just as it has done since Roman times. Today, the first slice is cut by the bride to ensure a fruitful marriage, though once the cake was literally broken over the bride’s head; guests then scrambled for fragments, which would bring fortune.

 

Traditional Weddings

 

In Britain people get married either in church or in a registry office. In the US people often get married in a house, a garden, a park, a hotel, or in a wedding chapel as well as in church. Most people, when they think of a wedding, think of people getting married in church and the many customs that go with this type of wedding, called a white wedding. Even people who are not religious often want to have a traditional white wedding in a church.