Public school/private school

In the United States, a public school is an elementary or secondary school that is a part of a system of free schools maintained by public taxes and supervised by local authorities. A private school, on the other hand, is one that is not open to, intended for, or controlled by the public. That is, it charges tuition and is operated for profit by an individual or a nongovernmental agency. Americans who read or hear about the educational system in England may be confused, for nowadays an English public school is any of a number of endowed, private boarding schools — Eaton or Harrow, for example — that prepare the students, mainly men, for Oxford, Cambridge, and other established universities.

Secondary school/high school

A secondary school, which offers instruction in academic or vocational subjects, traditionally begins with grade 9 and ends with grade 12. In the United States, a public secondary school is called a high school and a private secondary school that prepares students to enter college is called a preparatory school, or prep school.

Depending on the school district, formal secondary education can be organized in any of several different ways. For example, grades 10 through 12 might be taught in a senior high school (now often shortened to high school), and grades 7 through 9 in a junior high school. What is known as a junior-senior high school in some places might follow that three-three split, or it might assign grades 7 and 8 to junior high and grades 8 through 12 to senior high.

Use of the term middle school is far from standardized in educational circles. To some educators and administrators, a middle school is somewhere between an elementary school and a secondary school, consisting of three or four grades variously included in grades 5 through 8. To others, it is an early secondary school, for grades 6 through 8. And to still others, it is a junior high school, for grades 7 and 8. Whatever the level of instruction offered, a middle school is seldom called an intermediate school anymore.

Junior college/community college

A junior college, now often called a two-year college because its program ordinarily lasts two years, is a postsecondary educational institution. Some students transfer credit for the courses to a four-year institution. Others take the courses as career training in various fields, receiving an associate degree or a certificate on completion of their studies. They might, for example, be awarded an AA (Associate in, or of, Arts) or an AS (Associate in, or of, Science).

A community college is a junior college established to serve a certain community and sponsored by a unit of local government. The program, which normally lasts between one and three years, is more likely to emphasize career training over academic courses. Like a junior college, a community college awards associate degrees.

College/university

Although the word college is applied loosely to any institution offering postsecondary education, it has a number of specific meanings. As an institution of higher learning, a college may grant baccalaureate degrees (for example, BA, or Bachelor of Arts, and BS, or Bachelor of Science) after a four-year course of study. Or, like a junior college (now often called a two-year college), it may grant associate degrees after a two-year course. While some colleges are independent, others are part, perhaps undergraduate divisions, of universities. A college that is a graduate school within a university may grant master’s and doctoral degrees in such specialized courses of study as liberal arts, law, medicine and architecture. Another kind of college is a postsecondary school that offers specialized instruction in some profession or occupation; for example, a secretarial college. (The terms secretarial college, secretarial school, business college, and business school are sometimes used interchangeably. However, business school is more often applied informally to a graduate school of business administration within a university or to an undergraduate college of business administration.)

A university is an educational institution of the highest level. In the United States, it typically has one or more undergraduate colleges, together with a program of graduate studies and a number of professional schools. The degrees it confers include the bachelor’s, master’s, and doctor’s.

 

TASK: MATCH THE WORDS WITH THEIR DEFINITIONS:

 

An educational institution of the highest level	A private school
An elementary or secondary school that is a part of a system of free schools maintained by public taxes and supervised by local authorities (in the USA)	A community college
A junior college established to serve a certain community and sponsored by a unit of local government	A public school
A private secondary school that prepares students to enter college (in the USA)	A university
An educational establishment that is operated for profit by an individual or a nongovernmental agency (in the USA)	A preparatory school or prep school

JOKES

Professor: Can you tell me anything about the great chemists of the 17^th century?

Student: Yes, sir, they are all dead, sir.

 

Instructor: Cadet Brown, why aren’t you listening?

Brown: Yes, I am, sir.

Instructor: Then repeat my last words.

Brown: Cadet Brown, why aren’t you listening?

 

At a college examination a professor said: «Does the question embarrass you?»

«Not at all, sir,» replied the student, «not at all. It is the answer that bothers me».

 

«If the Dean doesn’t take back what he said to me this morning, I am going to leave college».

«What did he say?»

«He told me to leave college.»

 

Professor: Before we begin the examination are there any questions?

Student: What’s the name of this course?

 

Professor: You can’t sleep in my class.

Student: If you didn’t talk so loud I could.

 

In one of college classes the professor was unable to stay for the class, so he placed a sign on the door which read as follows: «Professor Blank will be unable to meet his classes today».

Some college lad, seeing his chance to display his sense of humour after reading the notice, walked up and erased the «c» in the word «classes». The professor noticing the laughter wheeled around, walked back, looked at the student, then at the sign with the «c» erased — calmly walked up and erased the «l» in «lasses», looked at the stunned student and proceeded on his way.

 

Professor: Never mind the date. The examination is more important.

Student: Well, sir, I wanted to have something right on my paper.

 

«Say, dad, remember that story you told me about when you were expelled from college?»

«Yes.»

«Well, I was just thinking, dad, how true it is that history repeats itself.»

 

«A telegram from George, dear.»

«Well, did he pass the examination this time?»

«No, but he is almost at the top of the list of those who failed.»

 

A young teacher just beginning his career asks advice of an older member of the faculty: «What have you learned in your years of experience?»

«I’ve learned one thing. Often you will find while you are giving a lesson in class that there is one young upstart who always disagrees with you. Tell me, would you stop him and try to make him shut up right then and there?»

«I suppose I would.»

«Well, don’t. He’s probably the only one who is listening to you.»

An upstart — выскочка

 

Too Fond of Talking

A politician was invited to give a talk on Americanisms to the pupils of the grammar school he had attended as a boy.

«When I see your smiling faces before me», he began in the accepted oratorical style, «it makes me back to my childhood. Why is it, my dear boys and girls, you are all so happy?»

He paused for the rhetorical effect, and instantly went up a grimy hand from the front row.

«Well, my lad, what is it?»

«The reason we’re so happy», replied the boy, «is if you talk long enough we won’t have a geography lesson this morning»

grimy hand — зд. рука ученика, пожелавшего сказать суровую правду

 

The chemistry professor wrote the formula HNOз on the blackboard. Then he pointed a finger at the inattentive student and said: «Identify that formula, please.»

«Just a moment,» answered the student, I’ve got it right on the tip of my tongue, sir!»

«Then,» said the professor softly,» you’d better spit it out. It is nitric acid.

HNO_з— nitric acid — азотная кислота

 

TASK: Change the jokes into Reported Speech

 

SUPPLEMENTARY READING

HIGHER EDUCATION IN CANADA

Universities in Canada date from the earliest days of European settlement, with Universitete Laval, founded in 1663 as the Seminaire de Quebec, among the oldest universities in North America. The first English-speaking university in Canada was the University of New Brunswick, established in 1785 in Fredericton as the Academy of Arts and Science. It was followed by the University of King’s College, sponsored by the Church of England, which opened its doors in Nova Scotia in 1789. Canadian universities have their roots in a mixture of religious, government and private support. They were small, elitist institutions, focusing on religious training and what today would constitute programs in the liberal arts. Only five had more than 100 students. Until 1875, when New Brunswick’s Mount Allison University awarded a bachelor’s degree to a woman, all graduates were men.

Today, large numbers of Canadians continue to see a university education as fundamental to their future well-being.

Canadian universities have a tradition of institutional autonomy and academic freedom. With the exception of the federal military college and a few institutions originally established by royal charter, provincial legislation is responsible for establishing universities and making changes in their charters. The boards of most universities are made up of representatives appointed by government, as well as members from the private sector, university administration, faculty, student association and alumni. Their function is to oversee university financial operations and to maintain liaison with governments and the general public. The titular head of a Canadian university is called the chancellor, who may be elected or appointed to serve in this post.

There are currently 500,000 full-time undergraduates at Canadian universities, 200,000 part-time undergraduates, and 75,000 full-time and 40,000 part-time graduate students. Canadian universities are highly accessible, with a participation rate of 17. 5 percent of the prime 18 to 21-year-old age group in 1996. Women have a higher participation rate than men. The social sciences remain by far the largest field of study in Canada, followed by education and the humanities. Biochemistry and computer science have been among the fastest growing disciplines at the bachelor’s level in the last five years.

Students vary greatly from university to university, with wide differences in their social and economic backgrounds, reasons for going to university and lifestyles. Many of today’s students are the first generation in their families to go to university. Most Canadian students do not live far from home while attending university. Even if they don’t live at home, most students choose a university close to home. And only about eight persent of Canadian students go to another province for their undergraduate work.